


Slang: Peculiarity or deviation in sexual behavior or taste

by ao3afterdark



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/F, F/M, advance warning that this fic actually does end happily with lavellan and her gal pal, hashtag relatable amiright, lavellan spends most of this fic either jacking off or sad or both, that said
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-14
Updated: 2017-04-14
Packaged: 2018-10-18 16:36:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10620846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ao3afterdark/pseuds/ao3afterdark
Summary: Inquisitor Lavellan nurses a secret. Not that she's attracted to women, as she's long since known and grown comfortable with that. No, Lavellan cannot seem to stop replaying dark fantasies involving men, and as shameful as it is to experience these thoughts, it would be even more so to admit to them. Enter Cassandra.





	

Saibot Lavellan leaned heavily against the door to her quarters, closing it with her back. The silence and solitude she'd desperately sought all afternoon was complete, and Saibot eased out a shaking sigh as she shoved a hand down her leggings. Her fingers came away wet, and she bit her lip, worrying it between her teeth as she stumbled towards her bed. Her free hand came up to tug at the buttons on her shirt. She imagined the unseen men who prowled her mind at such times growling in impatience, and obeyed the urge to give a sharp yank, scattering the next few rows of buttons. 

Maybe she'd have been drunk, this time, or caught unawares by a group of her own courtiers. She looked through and discarded several well-thumbed fantasies before arriving at the one she kept returning to again and again, of waking in the middle of the night to find someone far larger and heavier than her pressing her into the bed with his weight, one hand clamped tight over her mouth while his other would fit itself to her breast. Fitting deed to her thoughts, Saibot grabbed at one of her small breasts, weighing it in her hand. "Pitiful," she imagined the man sneering, and drew her thumb down the center of her nipple to draw out a whine. "This is hardly worth my time." Despite that, she knew the man in her fantasies wouldn't stop, imagined a flash of teeth in the near-darkness. "You'd better make up for it in other areas, herald," he would say, drawing out her title with disdain. Her legs parted of their own volition, spreading wide for a rough hand that wasn't there but that she imagined grasping her firmly, drawing out a soft, guttural sound that was all need.

A face swam in front of her, but she pushed it away. No, she did _not_ want to imagine any of her companions fulfilling this role, please and thank you. Though, of course, now that she didn't want to think of it, of them, that was all she could think about. Of Varric's square tipped fingers firmly grasping her jaw and yanking her around to look at him. That slow coiling smirk that seemed to make men and woman and nonbinary people alike swoon, though in this case, it would hold an edge few had ever seen. "I wonder what your admirers would say if they could see you now," he would drawl, before giving a pause. His eyes would be sparkling with a dark glee. "Now _there's_ an idea," he would say slowly, before pulling her upright and forcing her out of her quarters, half naked and all. 

The thought of being seen in such a state by anyone at all, but less those whose opinion made and broke dynasties made her throat dry out and an eager little shiver send her bucking up into her hand, forcing pressure against her clit. "Ah! Varric! More!" She gasped, all without meaning too, and blushed, despite the fact that she was alone, then again at the thought of how that would make this imaginary version of Varric laugh. Her blood quickened at the thought, and a thin, wavering whimper escaped from between the tight press of her lips. She had grown into the habit of pleasuring herself in silence, and even now that she had ample privacy, a room of her own, it was hard to shake. Hard to even purposefully make noise, sometimes, but now that she thought of The Iron Bull stepping between the spread of her legs where she would be forcibly bent in half over the chair. Her fingers unconsciously sped up as she tried to imagine the tactile pleasure of Bull's calloused fingers drawing down her spine and up again, before cracking sharp and unexpected across her ass.

Thought of her yelp ringing out through the throne room, of hands reaching out to pinch and twist and play with her like a toy, their toy. Her breath shuddered out half a sob as she thought of looking up to see Cole, dear Cole, watching her, strange colorless eyes riveted on the heaving of her chest as she fought for air. Maybe he'd already have his cock out, would approach and fist a hand in her hair, pulling her head up from where she would have let it fall, feeding his cock into her mouth even as The Iron Bull would thrust into her from behind. Shudders ran up and down her legs at the thought of Bull slowly pulling out of her, inch by delicious inch, before shoving in hard enough that she would gasp around Cole's length. Of him taking advantage of this by fucking her mouth fast and hard, groaning half-caught words she would barely understand but that would make her back arch, pressing back to meet Bull's every thrust. 

"Fuck," Saibot grit out, and Bull through her, imagining he was gripping the swell of her hips bruisingly tight. She'd heard things about how qunari were endowed, and while she didn't know whether to believe it or not, the thought of being spread wide and open with half the court looking on, judging her and encouraging Bull and the others all the while, made her whine, grinding her palm against her clit. She was halfway through a babbled plea to men who weren't there to please fuck her, in response to their telling her she wouldn't get what she wanted otherwise, when the very familiar sound of Cassandra clearing her throat made Saibot shriek and leap upward, falling half out of bed.

Cassandra's tawny cheeks were noticeably darkened in a flush. She lifted an elegant slash of a brow above a slow, spreading smile. "If you needed alone time," she said, dropping her eyes to where the tips of the fingers on Saibot's left hand were wrinkled, "I wouldn't have minded coming later. Or earlier," she said with a laugh that only got more amused when Saibot choked. "From the look of you," Cassandra told her, "it seemed quite. Athletic." And more than that, her expression told Saibot, and she flushed, even more so when Cassandra hesitated briefly before asking with a very soft, very hesitant smile, "Would it be overstepping to ask what you were thinking of?"

Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Saibot's stomach leaped up into her mouth. Either she feed into Cassandra's admitted uncertainty about being valued, or she tell her that she'd been thinking of being fucked against her will. And, of course, she went with option A. Of course she did, even knowing that the outcome was impossible to know, but very very likely to be bad. She had never been able to say no to her love. "No. No, it. Its bad," she muttered, turning away and hunching into herself. "I want to tell you, I do!" She added quickly when Cassandra immediately came around the side of the bed, her face pinched with worry. "I just- I need a runup."

"Its not that important, truly," Cassandra began, but Saibot held up a hand.

"It is, I know it is. And you should've known before now, I just. Didn't know how to bring it up, or..."

"How I would take it when you did." Saibot nodded miserably. She didn't look up, couldn't, but at least Cassandra didn't sound upset when she went on, "While I cannot say how I will feel without knowing what it is, I can tell you that you are safe in this room, with me. If this is a part of you, we will handle it together."

Well, that. Oh. That did help.

Saibot gave her a shaky smile, one that was answered with a kiss to her forehead. "Alright," she murmured, hardly aware she'd said it aloud. "I- I have these. Thoughts. Fantasies, really, about men. Using me." She swallowed heavily when Cassandra did not interrupt her or make a noise of outrage or disgust, and hurried on before she could lose her courage, "It doesn't mean I don't love you or want to leave!" She added, near babbling now, her hands rising up to tangle in front of her chest. "They're just thoughts, I promise, I'll stop right now, I-"

Cassandra hushed her gently by placing a warm hand over Saibot's. "Breathe," Cassandra said. Not ordered, not yelled or snarled. She sounded like she always did when she was with Saibot, warm and attentive and solemn, and that, more than anything, released the iron bar across her chest and allowed her to draw in a breath, then another. "I will not ask you to banish a thought you enjoy, or that brings you comfort. It is fine." When Saibot looked up, startled, Cassandra gave a quiet little huff of a laugh, sounding almost embarrassed. "You think you're the first to have such thoughts?" Saibot's eyes went wide, and Cassandra waved it off with a crinkle eyed smile. "Later. We are talking about you."

"I thought we were talking about us."

"We were," Cassandra nodded, then paused, long enough that Saibot started to pull away and in on herself self consciously, only to stop when Cassandra asked, "Would it be better to, ah, experiment first? Dip your toes into unknown waters."

Saibot stared, almost unable to believe what she was hearing, or, after that, if it was truly what Cassandra wanted, then squeezed her eyes shut tight, burying her face into Cassandra's shoulder. "I don't know." Even dancing around the topic like this left her feeling on edge and not a little bit uncomfortably aroused. Alright, so maybe she did know.

"Are you sure?" She didn't have to look to see that heated look in Cassandra's eyes that usually left her mouth drying out. Now was no exception, especially now that she'd already been thinking of the other things, and squirmed restlessly, pressing her thighs tightly together. Cassandra did not miss this, and deliberately dropped her hand to the back of Saibot's neck. She caressed it with soft touches and a soft kiss pressed to the corner of Saibot's mouth before her fingers tightened. "Is this what you like?" She murmured against Saibot's skin. Cassandra tried and failed to smother a chuckle that was rich as chocolate and twice as smooth when Saibot let out a wavering moan, and gave a tug, pulling Saibot forward until she tumbled onto her hands and knees. 

"You want a taste of the forbidden?" Cassandra asked, rising to her feet to walk behind Saibot. She turned her head to keep Cassandra in her line of sight, and jerked with an involuntary yelp when Cassandra struck her ass with the flat of her hand. It was the sound, more than the pain, that shocked her, but she obediently turned around to face forward, straining to hear what Cassandra said next. Anticipation surged in her veins, heightening every small sound, every movement. Cassandra shifting her weight. A soft sound that almost sounded like a slither, and she frowned uncertainly, started to turn around before catching herself. Not fast enough, however. Something slapped sharply across her ass in the same spot, and this time her cry was pained, but threaded through with a desire that made her breaths come fast and heavy. 

"Tell me about it," Cassandra said in that same, smoky voice she knew made Saibot quite forget whatever she'd been going to say. And she did, long enough for Cassandra to make a thoughtful noise that made Saibot hasten to answer.

"Tell you what?"

She jumped against when something touched the still stinging skin on her ass, but it was soft. Felt like a handkerchief. This was confirmed when liquid silk drew across her eyes, draping down so that she caught sight of a few interesting things Cassandra must have pulled out from their hiding places, before it drew tight. "About these men. What do they look like, sound like. What do they do."

Now that her vision was cut off, Saibot was fair quivering, giving a violent twitch when Cassandra passed her fingers across her shoulder, a steadying gesture. She caught just enough breath to stammer out, "They- they are big. Bigger than I am."

"Humans?"

"Sometimes," Saibot said evasively, thinking of Varric and Bull and Cole. They always had been, before, but thinking of specific people was more exciting than that, she thought with a guilty squirm that went breathless when Cassandra hummed thoughtfully. She knew that sound. It was a planning sound. Tactical. 

"Well? Do not stop there."

"Uhm. They are, um." Saibot winced, already anticipating the response. "Angry, sometimes, but not always. Usually, they laugh. Say things."

"Do they now?" Cassandra said softly, the sound of her footfalls moving behind her again, the soft kidskin of her gloves setting her nerves alight as it trailed down her back, lifting away befort it could touch where her skin must have surely been red. "Degrading things?"

"Yes." It was near soundless. Admitting it out loud was. Terrifying. Exhilarating. And telling Cassandra of all people, her lover, twisted both together in ways that made her near lightheaded.

"Do they tell you that you look like a whore?" It was said casually, almost thoughtfully, but that very casualness went straight to her groin. "Spread out like this, waiting for someone, anyone, to come along and take what they want?" Hearing those words out loud, being touched by hands that weren't her own, was near overwhelming. Saibot gasped, leaning eagerly into Cassandra's touch, and was unable to help letting out a whine when Cassandra pulled her hand away, only for something wide and blunt to press between her folds, moistened with something cool. There was only one thing in the room that felt like that, and she was proven right when she felt Cassandra settle heavy and warm against her back. Her shirt was still on, everything was, and the contrast between that and her own state of undress made Saibot shiver. "I thought so. I need you to ask for it, though," Cassandra told her, and Saibot barely held back the eager sound that near strangled her. But, if Cassandra really was playing this game...

"Never," she snarled, tossing her head. She was swiftly answered by another strike on her ass, then another, again and again until she was gasping on the edge of pleasure and pain, twisting in place, torn between pressing closer or retreating. As quickly as it had started, however, it stopped. Saibot wilted in place, which earned her a laugh. 

"That eager?" Cassandra asked, laughter threaded through her every word. "How disappointing. I was hoping to break you." 

Saibot tried to muster up something cutting to say, but almost as soon as she opened her mouth, Cassandra started to play with her breasts with one hand even as she teased at her clit. The combination of sensations was overwhelming, was too much and not enough, went on and on and on until Sabot thought she would go mad if it went on for one second longer. Or if it stopped. "Ask me," Cassandra sing-songed in her ear, "and you shall receive. Refuse, and this will go on for hours." There was promise in her tone, which would have been thrilling at any other time, but just now, Saibot needed it, she would fly apart at the seams if Cassandra didn't fuck her right now.

"Please!" Saibot sobbed, pressing back into Cassandra's touch. "Please fuck me, I- I need-" Whatever she'd been going to say was driven out of her in a rush as Cassandra yanked her back onto her. She moaned helplessly, hopelessly, dropping her head between the bend of her arms, answered by a thrust, then a second, a third, and another one of those chuckles that made everything feel brighter and more intense.

"There we are," Cassandra panted into the shell of her ear, working a hand between them to flicker her fingers against Saibot's clit. Between that and the steady, relentless pace of the dildo being driven out of her again and again and again made Saibot writhe. Cassandra hummed appreciatively and tugged Saibot more firmly against her. "Not just yet," she breathed. "Not until everyone sees what you look like impaled on my cock. I want to hear you moan for me." She adjusted the angle of her thrusts, and the next sent sparkles of heat dancing up her spine. "Again," Cassandra snapped out in that parade ground voice Saibot so loved, straightening to force Saibot's head down onto the floor. "You are going to stay right here while everyone who would lower themselves to touch you uses your holes. What do you think," she said softly. "Two sovereigns for your cunt?" Saibot jerked with a whimper. "Hm. One for your mouth, and..." A laugh. "Your ass is free." 

Saibot couldn't hold back a moan this time, long and loud and wanton as she'd ever been in her fantasies, her legs inching open wider. Cassandra made a curious noise in the back of her throat and bit down hard on Saibot's shoulder as she increased the pace until Saibot wailed, she keened, but she couldn't come, couldn't, it was too much and not enough, not until Cassandra bent close and whispered that, spread out like this, breathless with begging and want, she was the most beautiful woman she had ever seen, and then she fell apart, tumbling over a steep divide into the bottomless well of sensation on the other side. She seized tight as a bowstring, tremors bowing her spine and pushing her back into Cassandra, who hadn't stopped or slowed at all, had in fact quickened her pace. Saibot's fingers clutched tight on Cassandra's for every admiring word Cassandra pressed into her sweat soaked hair, her neck, the shadowed place where her shoulder dipped.

She came back to herself only gradually, breathing hard, eyes fluttering around a throaty murmur of contentment. Now that Cassandra had released her grip, Saibot slumped onto her front. She didn't move when Cassandra removed the blindfold and settled herself against Saibot's back with a grumble that vibrated through where they were pressed together. She still hadn't taken off the strap-on, and it pressed against the joining of Saibot's legs in an all too distracting way at odds with how Saibot's heart raced when Cassandra cleared her throat. "Is this something you think you would truly want?" Cassandra asked. Her tone was spectacularly unhelpful, giving no clue as to whether that would be a very dangerous thing to say. "To introduce men to our bed, knowing that you do not desire them at all, but the danger they could be?"

Saibot hesitated, then drew in a deep breath before blurting out, "I- maybe," she said, unable to quite look Cassandra in the eye, even more so when she said what came next. "Do you think you would be very angry if I did?"  

"I think," Cassandra answered, pulling her close until Saibot sank against her, her soft curves melting against Cassandra's angles in ways that had always felt like coming home, "that I have demonstrated that I would not be opposed to it. So long as I know, and that it is what you want? No. I would not be angry."

A shaky smile chased itself across Saibot's face, to lodge into the corner of her mouth, there to be kissed away by Cassandra. Saibot let out a soft, almost soundless sigh of relief and finally, finally relaxed. "You really are too good to me," she said quietly into Cassandra's collarbone.

"Nonsense," was her response. "I am exactly as good as you deserve. Now, go to sleep. You need to wake up early so that you may devote time to how you plan on telling Bull that you have words for him."

_"What?"_


End file.
